Friday, December 10, 2010

the truth . .

It's time to be honest.

Honest to you. But mostly honest to myself.

I am disappointed.

I am disappointed that a 2nd baby is not coming as easy as I thought it would.

I see friends getting pregnant, bloggy friends getting pregnant, and I feel sad. High school FB friends talking about being pregnant. Sometimes I just want to say, ENOUGH! Don't get me wrong, I am happy for all of them, very happy.

But what about us?

Why is it not happening?

It has been 7 months. One of my good friend's told me not to worry it took her a couple months to conceive her daughter but I am still sad. Disappointed...did I mention that already?

I put on a happy face each month when my period comes but, inside I wish there were a little one growing.

Today when I dropped Will off at school I got back in my car and started crying. Everyone in his class has a sibling and here we are still trying to get pregnant. Sometimes it just doesn't seem fair.

I haven't even told my sisters that we have been trying this long because, I just don't want to hear it.

I just hope and pray that maybe this Christmas God will bless us.

14 comments:

Heather B. said...

Oh sweetie, it will happen!! It took us almost a year to conceive our daughter. I think one of the reason it took so long is because I was so stressed and upset about it that my body was rebelling!!! However, once I said a little prayer and let it go, BAM, pregnant! I am not even kidding! Relax, give it to Jesus and he will do the rest!!! :)

Krista said...

I totally know how you feel, I was going through the same thing 2 Christmas' ago to the point I convinced myself I was pregnant...turned out to be the stomach flu. Baby #2 will come at the perfect time! Take care of yourself and relax!! I'll be saying a prayer that Santa brings your everything you want for Christmas :)

Brandi said...

Hang in there girl. I have to agree... we can want something so badly but for whatever reason our timing isn't right. His timing is always right, though. I'll say a prayer for you. :)

Bethany said...

Thank you for being so honest! I can't even imagine how you are feeling, but please know I am praying for you and will send a special request to Santa for you ;)

Christy said...

Even in normal healthy couples, it can take up to a year. I know that you are sad about not being pregnant, and that these words mean nothing to you, but I think you are perfectly normal. It took us 4 months to get pregnant with Porgie (the longest for months of my life!).

Liz said...

oh, jenny! i'm sorry for your sadness! it will work out soon; just try to focus on will and the season and all the good things, and the pieces will fall into place.

Lindsay said...

oo hugs.. email me please :-)

Jennifer said...

It took us 8 months to concieve our daughter. I am currently 4 1/2 months along. It was so hard hearing everyone's news on facebook. It especially hurt when people said "just relax it will happen." I know what you are going through. Jennifer

What I Did Today said...

I'm sorry. That's so rough. Sending up a little prayer for you.

Shell said...

Sending prayers for you!

Krystyn said...

I'll be thinking about you and praying for a little blessing your way.

I don't know this exact dilemma, but I know the hurt of seeing other people announce their pregnancies or the sex of their baby (when I was supposed to be finding out). It hurts..and it's okay to cry.

Chelle said...

I'm so sorry your time isn't here! I wish I had words of wisdom but honestly I suck at 'em. Just know you are in my thoughts and prayers that you are blessed soon.

amanda said...

it's so hard isn't it ... i am proud of you for saying it out loud and am sending a little prayer your way for happy news in the very near future!

Adrienne said...

Hang in there. That's tough. I'm sure you've heard it all by now(I know this post was from yesterday), but it's all in God's timing. Somtimes we just don't want to hear that though! huh? I know I'm waiting for things that seem like they will never come, and I think it's perfectly fine to be sad, frustrated, or anything else. Hang in there. Sending prayers for a Christmas miracle. <3